


for me to know (and everyone to find out)

by joshlymanwalkandtalk (Joshlymanwalkandtalk)



Category: Crooked Media RPF
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-11-01
Updated: 2018-11-01
Packaged: 2019-08-07 23:41:33
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,538
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16418282
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Joshlymanwalkandtalk/pseuds/joshlymanwalkandtalk
Summary: Lovett's getting curious





	for me to know (and everyone to find out)

**Author's Note:**

  * For [anatomical_heart](https://archiveofourown.org/users/anatomical_heart/gifts).



> [Haptics](https://archiveofourown.org/series/1108563) by [anatomical_heart](https://archiveofourown.org/users/anatomical_heart/pseuds/anatomical_heart)

Lovett isn't Tommy's keeper, but it's hard not to notice how he's been gone more and more lately. All of a sudden, for almost the past month, Tommy's been spending more nights somewhere else or coming home late into the night, or even the morning. Lovett only noticed because his sleep schedule is also fucked, but Tommy actually gets up in the morning. How is he sleeping?

Lovett notices that too. Tommy sleeps like the dead now. He used to get up or toss around, nothing major, something that Lovett knew, again, from his wildly irresponsible sleeping habits, but now there's nothing. There were times he wondered if Tommy wasn't home because of the silence, but it was the same when he saw Tommy go to bed too. He might not be sleeping much, but he’s sleeping better.

So where is he going?

Lovett keeps thinking about it, pouring over the possibilities, but they're pretty basic and follow the same story: Tommy met a girl, Tommy's fucking that girl, and Tommy's finally getting laid. Simple. But he's itching to know details. Not _those_ details, but he's a sucker for gossip. He's just so _curious_ , but once he catches himself thinking about it before falling asleep, like counting sheep, he makes the decision to finally satisfy his curiosity and ask Tommy himself. If Tommy's solution to sleep deprivation is getting laid, Lovett's insomnia is in desperate need of a date.

In the morning, Lovett's sitting on the edge of the bed, putting his shoes on, when he hears the door click shut. Lovett thought Tommy had already left. Lovett checks the clock. Early for him but late for Tommy. He should have been gone over an hour ago, but Tommy didn’t come in until well after midnight.

He scrambles around, grabbing his computer and badge, stuffing everything into his messenger bag. A pass through the kitchen and three cans of Diet Coke added to his bag, he's out the door.

+++++

“So, who is she?” Lovett blurts, trying to catch his breath. Tommy's health regimen is a scam; Tommy isn't more in shape, his legs are just too long.

Tommy smiles down at him, full of charm. “Morning, Lovett.”

“Don’t give me that empty pleasantries crap, Vietor, answer the question.” Lovett hadn’t really slept that night and his need to know hot gossip has left him frustrated and exhausted.

“Rough night?” Tommy's face looks mock concerned. Lovett's not having it.

“You have some nerve looking even halfway awake and decent when I know for a fact you didn’t come home until 1:00 am.”

“‘Cause that’s not creepy at all,” Tommy says, crossing the street the second the light turns, practically walking into traffic.

“Hey—” Lovett yells, chasing after Tommy and his long damn legs, “I’m a good fucking roommate!” He’s concentrating on catching up and so is his brain. “And I care about your well-being!” Some things are afterthoughts.

Tommy looks so fucking smug. “Lying doesn’t become you, Lovett.”

Lovett rolls his eyes. “Fuck you,” he says, finally catching up to Tommy's side. He's gonna break those long legs. Instead, he swoops in and takes Tommy's coffee from him. Tommy barely flinches. Lovett bitterly takes a sip. “So. Who is she?”

Tommy uses the same voice he does for the press when they're barking up the wrong tree, or when he wants them to _think_ they're barking up the wrong tree. “Who’s who?”

Lovett is going to keep barking until he's hoarse. “You’re such a child. Don’t be obtuse.” Tommy snorts a laugh, proving his point. Lovett sighs. “Your new girlfriend. What’s her name? Krista?”

“That’s oddly specific. Do you know a Krista?”

Lovett shakes his head and fists, almost splashing coffee in himself. He takes a careful, steady breath. “Thomas,” he says, going for proper and polite. “As your closest, most trusted personal adviser—”

“Nope.”

Lovett huffs. “As your best and dearest friend—”

Tommy announces his disagreement with a low sound from his throat.

Lovett's voice is rising. “As the person who shares half of the rent in an overpriced apartment in this godforsaken city—”

“There we go.”

“I want you to feel free to express yourself and be open—”

“With information about who I may or may not be dating or sleeping with?” Tommy says, bemused.

“Exactly!” Lovett crows as they enter the check in to the building. He looks back up at Tommy. “I’m so glad we see it the same way.” Their badges get them through security quickly, the line short.

“Y’know, Lovett,” Tommy says, “it makes me so happy to know I can go to you with something like that.” His voice drips with exaggerated gratitude so much so that Lovett laughs and almost chokes on his stolen coffee despite himself.

“And if something like that is ever something I want to discuss with you, you’ll be the first to know, okay? Have a good day,” Tommy says in a rush and quickly turns on his heels in the opposite direction of Lovett's shared office.

Lovett's blood boils. “You WASP bastard,” he spits before raising his voice across the hall. “I care about your feelings!” And he doesn't care who knows it.

+++++

Tommy doesn't come home that night at all. Lovett’s gonna scream. It goes on for another week before Lovett can’t take it anymore. He’s desperate to know.

“C’mon, Tommy. We never spend time together anymore,” Lovett whines, lovingly.

Tommy pops his head out of the bathroom doorway, wet hair dripping down his face. “I’m not staying home to watch you play video games,” he says before disappearing. “Again,” he calls back, his voice echoing off the tile.

Lovett heaves a heavy sigh and pushes himself up from the couch to follow Tommy. Tommy’s standing at the bathroom mirror, his entire head draped in a towel. He ruffles it gracelessly around his head and he’s shower pink when he finally shows his face.

“Why won’t tell me? No judgements. I don’t judge.”

“You are one of the most judgemental people I know,” Tommy says, rubbing at his face in the mirror.

“Are you ashamed? Is that why you won’t tell me?”

Tommy doesn’t turn around, just looks at Lovett in the mirror. “I’m not ashamed of anything. And you’re not entitled to anything. Why does my sex life concern you so much?”

Lovett feels caught, his frustrating curiosity getting him in trouble yet again. “You’re an enigma, Thomas.”

“Last week you told me I was as complicated as two-ply toilet paper,” Tommy says, finally turning around.

Lovett’s hands and shoulders fly up. “How do they get those two plies lined up without them completely sticking together? Very complicated and mysterious!”

Tommy rolls his eyes and throws his towel over the shower rod, reaching for his shirt. A _nice_ shirt. Lovett’s mind screams, _Where is he going?_ , but he’s realizing it’s a question without an answer and he’s just gonna have to live with that until he dies. Dammit, Tommy.

“I’m going out and I probably won’t be back tonight,” Tommy says. “How’s that, _Mom_?” He drags out the vowel before smiling humorlessly, brow ridges up to his scalp, and closes the door in Lovett’s face.

_Dammit, Tommy._

+++++

“How are you so chipper this morning?”

Dan looks up from his coffee to see Alyssa standing over his desk. It’s still too early for human interaction, something he usually gets to avoid by getting there before everyone else. But people still find him. “I didn’t do anything,” Dan says, speaking words only the third time that day.

“You didn’t have to,” she says, plopping down into the chair facing the desk. “I can read it all over you.”

Dan’s coffee is hot, but he takes a big gulp anyway. She’s watching him, but not saying anything, just looking him over. He can wait her out. 

“You’re too…” She motions to his entire being. “You’re a man going through a divorce. You shouldn’t look this cheerful at 7 am.”

“It’s an amica-”

“Quit it,” she says, cutting him off. ”It’s amicable, I know. But still. Are you really sleeping that much better at your new place?”

“Temporary place,” Dan corrects, “and I’m fine.”

Alyssa curls up in her seat, tucking her feet underneath herself, leaving her clogs on the floor. She examining him again, eyes narrow. He tries to ignore her and concentrate on his desk, but her eyes scratch all over him. They’re unavoidable.

“Don’t you have a meeting to go?” Dan says, rearranging the papers spread before him.

“I’ve scheduled,” she checks her watch, “five more minutes to bother you.”

Dan huffs out a laugh. “I’m glad you could make the time.”

“Anything for my best buddy,” she says with a wide smile, but it fades into a more serious, more concerned face. “I wanted to check in on how you’re doing, but you seem to be doing fine.”

“I told you-”

“But _why_?”

Dan rolls his eyes and throws his arm up. “I’m not sad enough for you?” Silence hangs in the room an extra beat. “Things are going good. I'm having a fine time.”

She stares at him. It feels like she's tracing every line of his face. Then her eyes fly wide. Her mouth drops like a cartoon. “Oh my god, are you already seeing someone? _Were you seeing someone before_ -”

“I didn’t cheat,” Dan says, a deep boom. His voice reverberates around them. He looks up to make sure his door is closed. He takes a deep breath and tries to relax the sudden tension in his neck.

Alyssa looks down at her hands. “I’m sorry, that was shitty.”

He gathers a pile of papers into a folder for his next meeting. Starts to build the folder for the meeting after that.

Alyssa’s voice is small. “ _Are_ you seeing someone?” Dan levels a look at her that should read _stop_ but Alyssa doesn’t give up. Never does.”C’mon, what is she like? Or _shes_?”

“I’m not sleeping my way through DC,” he says, sitting back in his chair. He takes a deep breath and sighs, leaning back with his hands behind his head. He’s too tired to fight. “I _am_ seeing someone and it’s _fine_.” So much for letting them squirm.

“I knew it! I knew it!” Alyssa cheers, unfurling from her chair like a blooming flower, her face rosy with triumph. “There was no way you’d look this well rested without getting some. So who are you seeing?”

_You know that cute blond spokesman for Nat Sec? He’s been wearing me out multiple nights a week. I’ve been sleeping like a baby._

Instead, he smirks at her and shakes his head. Enough crumbs for now.

“This isn’t over, Pfieffer,” she says, looking down at her watch. “But your time has run out for now.” She scoops each clog back on her feet and goes for the door. She turns before she pulls on the knob. “Am I happy for you?”

Dan can feel his face get warm. “Yeah, I think so.” He knows his blush is growing, but she doesn’t say anything, just smiles and closes the door behind her.

Dan reaches in his drawer for his personal phone.

**Alyssa’s starting to ask questions**  
**There’s only so much that will hold her off**

_Does she know anything?_

**Nothing specific, but she’s relentless**  
**Maybe not yet, but she will be**

_Lovett’s not a walk in the park either_

**What about Favs?**

_Hasn’t said anything but who knows_  
_Been seeing that new girl. I don’t think he’s been thinking about much else._

Dan stares down at his phone. He feels like he’s fewer steps ahead than he likes to be. They’re not going to be able to hold them off forever. His fingers hesitate over the screen. It takes two tries to start typing again.

**We should probably talk about it**

Dan tells himself that they’re busy people and that’s why Tommy doesn’t reply the rest of the day.

+++++

Dan’s rereading the president’s newest remarks in front of a muted TV when he hears the knock on his door. He looks at it as if he can see through it, but he doesn’t need to. He knows who it is. He gets up to open it and Tommy looks sheepish on the other side. “Sorry,” he shrugs. “I didn’t know what to say.”

Dan motions him inside and Tommy stands awkwardly in the living room. He follows Dan with his eyes. Dan leans on the arm of the couch with crossed arms, watching Tommy back.

“I don’t know what to do,” Tommy says, finally. “I think we’re gonna have to come up with _something_ to tell them.”

Dan squares his body to Tommy’s. “Is that what you want?” Tommy’s strung so tight he can barely shrug. He’s been stewing on this all day too.

Tommy walks around him to sit on the couch. “I don’t want to just tell them _something_.” He looks down at his hands and then back up to Dan. “I’d like to tell them more than that.”

“You mean tell them about us,” Dan asks, trying to maintain a neutral expression.

Tommy stands up to stand right in front of Dan and put his hands on Dan’s biceps. His grip is gentle, but solid. “I don’t want to hide away like this is all a dirty secret. I want to be able to talk about us. Casually say your name when I tell a story about my weekend. No more making up excuses.”

Dan’s chest feels so full it’s making his throat tight. He brings a hand up to Tommy’s face. “I want that too,” Dan says, letting his thumb smooth across Tommy’s chin. He laughs a little to himself and smiles so clear and wide. “I want to be able to talk about how happy I am.”

Tommy moves his grip to Dan’s wrist, holding it in place as he nuzzles deeper into it. Tommy’s cheek is soft. Tommy closes his eyes and loses himself for a second in the heat of Dan’s touch. “I’m happy too.”

Dan leans down to kiss him. He can feel Tommy’s smile against his own. He’s _so_ happy. It’s _real_. Him and Tommy.

“I'm gonna call you my boyfriend,” Tommy giggles, moving his hands down to Dan’s hips.

 

Dan’s thumbs catch on the corners of Tommy’s grinning mouth. “That’s good, because I _am_ your boyfriend. And you’re mine.”

Tommy surges forward to kiss Dan again. There’s only a fading smile this time. In its place is a growing heat and and want. The feeling was always there, but now they belong to each other. He’s Tommy’s and Tommy’s his. It’s so nice to say it out loud, finally, putting words to it. _Boyfriend_. Such a silly word to build a small fire in Dan’s gut.

They kiss until they tumble to the couch, not stopping once they’re tangled on the cushions.

That night they say “mine” until the word stops sounding like a word. They whisper it, speak it into each other’s skin, moan it into each other’s mouths. Dan tells Tommy he’s his with his cock down Tommy’s throat. Tommy says it choking on a burst of fresh air with Dan’s come on his lips.

It’s the last thing they tell each other that night, washed up and tucked into bed.

“ _My boyfriend_ ,” Tommy says with a giggle. “I feel like a teenager.”

Dan pulls him close in his arms. They fit together head to toe, their long frames complementary to one another. It’s nice to have someone just as big as he is. They can both hold each other and envelope the other while they do it. It’s nice to be held and to hold.

“I like it,” Dan says, staring at the ceiling. “Feels nice.”

Tommy takes Dan’s hand and rolls away from him, pulling Dan around him, curling into the little spoon. “Good night, boyfriend.”

Dan smiles into the back of Tommy’s hair. “Good night, boyfriend.”

+++++

Dan strolls in Alyssa’s office the next morning a new man. An honest man. A happy man. And he’s finally ready to stop caring who knows it.

“You were curious about who I was seeing.”

Alyssa’s head snaps up from where she’s leaning far over her desk to read a large map. “I’m still curious.”

“You know him,” he says, but she doesn’t say anything, This time she’s waiting him out.

“I’m dating Tommy. Vietor.”

“No!” Alyssa screams from behind her desk. She lowers herself slowly, carefully into her chair. “You’re _kidding_.”

Dan smiles wide enough that he can feel it stretching his face. “Fortunately, I’m not.”

She covers her mouth in shock, only moving it to speak. “ _You’re kidding,_ ” she repeats, slower.

“Still not kidding,” he says, shaking his head.

She’s quiet and Dan can see the mental math playing out on her face, trying to put one and one together. Her mouth opens, hangs, and then closes again. He’s waiting for it, for whatever she’s going to ask. She repeats the move two more times. _You’re with a **guy**? Is that why you’re separated? Tommy? **How?**_ Dan can’t take it. _Get ahead of the story._ he reminds himself.

“ _Someone_ in your office gave him my current address and,” he pauses and thinks about that first night. Tommy was a heat seeking missile. He came for Dan and wasn’t going to leave without getting what he wanted. He wanted, wants, Dan. He realizes he trailed off. “It kind of started from there.”

“He came to your place?”

“You’re getting a lot of details here, don’t push it.”

She exhales a held breath and shakes her head. “I never would’ve guessed.”

Dan still waiting for the questions, but they don’t come. Alyssa knows him better than he ever thinks she does and he’s always being reminded.

She levels her gaze at him. “Am I happy for you?”

“Yes,” Dan says, without hesitation. She smiles. He looks down to hide his blush. “I’ve got a meeting in a minute, so I have to go.”

Alyssa get up, pointing her finger at him. “This isn’t over,” she says, looking up at him and poking him in the chest.

He puts his hand on her shoulder and backs away. “I know.”

“I mean. Tommy? Really?”

“Yeah, he’s pretty great.” He makes sure to close the door behind him, bounce across the hall to grabs his notes, and run off to the first meeting of many that day he would be late for.

+++++

“My boyfriend is coming over tonight,” Tommy says, not letting the butterflies in his stomach wobble his words.

“Your wha-!” Lovett looks around, catching himself yelling. Luckily, it’s empty. Tommy’s not stupid. Not that stupid. “Your _what_?” he says, his whisper more a stage whisper and hissed sharp. The blood drains from his face, leaving it cold. He has to sit down. Shock is a terrible look on him. He covers his face with his hands and leans on his elbows, taking a few deep breaths. His face feels warmer when he sits up to look at Tommy.

Tommy’s standing still just inside the door, tall and barely breathing. His face is being held frozen calm with all of his energy. He’s struggling against it.

“Your _boy_ friend.” Lovett can’t help repeating it. Is this a stroke?

He doesn’t know how long he ends up staring at him, but he lets himself have a while. The shock loses a little of its edge and e can see a little more clearly. It hits him. Tommy’s not stupid.

“Did you tell me here so I couldn’t freak out?”

A guilt smirk tugs at the corner of his mouth. “Yes?”

“You son of a bitch.”

“So, I’ll meet you at home,” Tommy says simply, waves, and then walk off into the hallway.

_**What.** _

+++++

Lovett rushes home as soon as he can reasonably leave. He’s been drowning in questions and and deep thoughts on the nature of reality. How can someone change so drastically with one syllable. Everything he thought he knew about Tommy--poof--changed forever.

When he gets home, the apartment is empty. He changes his clothes and sits on the couch, waiting. He goes to get a Diet Coke and sits back down. He’s much earlier than Tommy is. He’s tempted to fire up his Playstation, but decides against it. They’re not actually going to take _forever_.

The key in the door echos down the hall and Lovett springs up, attempting to casually rush to the door. Only Tommy’s there with his bulky messenger bag. “Where is he?”

Tommy chuckles and steps inside to set his bag on the table. “Hello to you too, Lovett.” Tommy doesn’t stop until he gets to the kitchen. Lovett follows him the whole way. He stands over the fridge door while Tommy digs around inside. He stands up to drink the rest of his protein shake for that morning. “He’ll be in a half hour, settle down.”

Lovett scoffs. “Settle down? Settle down!”

“Yes, exactly.”

“Suddenly my longtime friend is into guys and I’m supposed to _settle down_?”

“It’s sudden to you.” Tommy walks to his room and closes the door behind him. Probably to change.

Lovett is left waiting on the couch again, twiddling his thumbs. He tries to, but he can’t get it and it does not make waiting better. It’s awkward and he stops, choosing to be still.

Tommy comes out of his room, newly dressed, and comes around the couch to sit next to Lovett. Lovett's shaken by the dip in the cushion. “Why didn't you tell me?” He can hear sadness in his voice, though he tries to hide it. He never would’ve judged Tommy, especially about _this_.

“I'm just not that out,” Tommy says. “It hasn't come up that much in my life, so I waited until I needed to, but then I had been waiting so long that it seemed too late.” He shakes his head. “I didn't keep it from you on purpose. I realize I'm an idiot. I was usually single or with a woman while I've known most of these people. But now I have a boyfriend, so the discussion is unavoidable.”

“I know what it’s like. Not saying anything.” Lovett feels the ghost of the lead weight that used to sit in the pit of his stomach all those years he never said anything. He hopes Tommy’s never felt that.

Tommy shrugs. “I’m not going to worry about it. He’ll be here soon anyway.”

It doesn’t take long for the knock to come at the door, three nice, solid taps. Tommy jumps up and Lovett watches him. He leans over the arm of the couch, trying to get a good look at the door. Tommy opens it, but stands in front of the guy so Lovett can’t see him. He’s tall. That’s all he can tell. But he also sees Tommy’s shoulders drop, completely relaxed. He’s happy to see him.

Lovett scrambles back onto the couch, minimally trying not to get caught. Tommy comes around the couch first, stopping to stand in front of Lovett. “I’d like you to meet my boyfriend.” He’s smiling and holding his hand out for… _Dan_?

“What is this?” Lovett says, looking between them.

“This is my boyfriend, Dan. I think you’ve met,” Tommy says with a cheeky smile on his face. He glances at Dan and Dan smiles back. Their smiles are soft for each other, but are conspiratorial when they look back at Lovett., like sharing a little secret.

They are each other’s little secret.

“Dan is your boyfriend,” Lovett says, looking between them. “You’re dating Dan Pfeiffer.”

Tommy nods.

Lovett turns his attention. “You’re Tommy’s boyfriend.”

“He’s my boyfriend too,” Dan says with a chuckle.

Lovett waves his hands in front of him, closing his eyes and shaking his head. He’s trying to get his mind in order. He’s still trying to recategorize Tommy in his mind with these new details and now he has to do that with Dan too? His brain is on fire from all the sparks. “So you both like guys.” Lovett knows it’s not a question.

They looks between each other again. Lovett sees their bodies sway toward each other, drawn toward each other but not touching. Lovett doesn’t know if he’s going to puke because of shock or eye-rolling disgust at such cute relationship things. They nod in unison and Lovett can’t help but roll his eyes.

“ _Two_ men I’ve known for a not insignificant amount of time have both been hiding the fact that they’re gay and then proceeding to be secretly gay with each other.”

“We’re not gay,” Dan says, “but your point still stands.”

Tommy motions for Dan to sit down and Tommy follows, both sitting at the other end of the couch. “I told you, I just haven’t been out and me and Dan were still feeling things out.” Lovett can see how much Tommy wants to hold Dan’s hand. Lovett feels terrible that he feels he can’t and that he feels he needs to. This should be easy. Telling Lovett should be easy!

Lovett sighs. “I can’t believe you’re boyfriends.”

Tommy and Dan laugh, bumping shoulders and finally leaning into each other. They both look happy. Seeing them together just magnifies how much better they’ve been.

“Am I at least the first to know?”

Silence. “No,” Tommy looks at Dan, whose eyebrows shoot up his forehead. “Second.”

Now Lovett feels judgemental. “Behind who?” He doesn’t try to raise his voice, but it does anyway.

“Alyssa,” Dan says. It’s strange to see Dan, the man that yells and stand up to the press and is generally kind of intimidating to people (Lovett is _not_ one of those people, but he’s heard things) look shrunken with guilt.

Lovett shakes his head. The _outrage_ of it all!

“But you _are_ the second,” Tommy reasons, “so you’re still ahead of a lot of people.”

Lovett narrows his eyes. “Okay,” he says, looking between them again. “I’ll accept that.”

“I was thinking of ordering takeout,” Dan says, moving to stand up. “Can we offer you some Chinese from that place up the block-”

“No, no, the place on Decatur,” Tommy chimes in.

Dan smiles at him. Lovett likes the look of it. “Can we offer you some Chinese from that place on Decatur?”

“I’ll accept that as well.”

Dan goes to the hall to call the restaurant, leaving Tommy and Lovett alone on the couch again.

“I never would’ve thought,” Lovett exhales, letting everything sink in. “The last twelve hours have rocked my worldview sideways. I may never recover.”

Tommy snorts. “Don’t be so dramatic.”

“But you? And Dan??” Lovett means well, but he knows he’s shrill.

Tommy looks back down the hall to where Dan is ordering on the phone. Lovett can see the soft smile in Tommy’s eyes as he looks Dan over. “He’s pretty great.” He turns back to Lovett, face pink. Lovett can’t help but find it cute. “I like him a lot.”

Lovett relaxes against the back of the couch, feeling drained from suspense and hunger. “Are you happy?”

Tommy doesn’t hesitate. “Yeah. We are.”

**Author's Note:**

> Written for the incomparable [anatomical_heart](https://archiveofourown.org/users/anatomical_heart/pseuds/anatomical_heart). I hope I got it right.


End file.
